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Penantian

huhu....npe aku asyik dgr lagu ni...


Dikamar ku menyepi
Hanya lilin menerangi
Beginikah seksanya
Hidup dalam penantian
Ditabir tirai malam
Ada insan kesepian, keseorangan...

Dan setiap detik yang ku lalui
Seluruh malam ku membisu
Tetap setia menantimu
Bayanganmu entah di mana

Mengapa harus kita ditemukan
Di saat jiwaku keresahan
Apakah aku satu persinggahan
Mengubat rindu... oh...

Kau dahagakan...
Ku kehausan...
Setitis rasa
Pada bayangan yang tak pasti... oh...

Kau nyalakan perasaan
Mengukir kemesraan
Mungkinkah ada sinar
Bersama impianku

Dah telah ku duga
Suasana keindahan seketika
Aku tetap menanti mu

Kau dahagakan...
Ku kehausan...
Setitik rasa... oh...
Aku tenggelam...
Kehampaan...
Keseorangan...

Mana sinaran ?...
Terangilah hidupku
Tak sanggup lagi... aku... sepi...

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Why...

Why...and why all these happened to me...why dear...I can't forget you..I can't..I've tried...I've...but can't dear...can't..

My mind cn't even stop to think of you..I miss you..
I can't stand without you...I'm lying to myself..lying that I can forget you...
Is there anyway that I can stay in your side....Is there?

I'm dedicated this song just for you...I know you read this post and I hope you read this...my love..

If you're not the one, then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you're not the one, then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine, then why does your heart return my call?
If you you are not mine, would I have the strength to stand at all?

I never know what the future brings
But I know you're here with me now
We'll make it through and I hope
You are the one I share my life with

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you, then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there anyway that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you, then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don't need you, then why does your name resound in my head?
If you're not for me, then why does this distance name my life?
If you're not for me, then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don't know why you're so far away
But I know that this much is true
We'll make it through and I hope
You are the one I share my life with

And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray that you're the one I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you, then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there anyway that I can stay in your arms?

'Cause I miss your body and soul so strong
That it takes my breath away
And I breath you into my heart
And I pray for the strength to stand today

'Cause I love you whether it's wrong or right
And though I can't be with you tonight
And though my heart is by your side

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you, then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there anyway that I can stay in your arms?

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At Last..

erm...1st and foremost...

I'm happy with my life now..I still have friend that understand me..

And let bygone be bygone...

Nothing can be change...Past always past..let it be history..memories..

Life must go on..

with new meaning...new soul...new hope...

I've found my rhythm back...my soul...and my soul mate...

So...I should cheer up..Still got someone else that can understand us..can love us..

and most important...love us with full of heart..not just being force..

so stupid love because being force..Is that meaning of love?

being force so that it so-called love..hahaha...

Go to Hell la..dont easily accept at first..if you can't...

If not..you will surely hurt your partner...

okeh than..

chill2...love someone that really love and accept you..

thats the beauty of love...

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Friends?


To all friends out there...even you're not my friend..but for me...you all my friend...

Till now..I'm still searching for someone to be my best of best friend..

Friend that will be there if I'm got problem..I'm sad...I'm not well..and the most important part..

Dont be backstabber...because I trust you!

IF when I say..I cant accept what you did or done to me? What would you feel my friend? I'm too cruel?

But did you think of it twice when you did it to me?to a person that you so-called friend?

Yah...I'm pretty sure that you might miscalculated in your action..but again..Let bygone be bygone..yeah..Im not sooooo damn cruel like what you did to me...so..If you did it..just tell me..I will forgive you...need time..yeah....forgiveness,yeah,we demand for our victim to forgive us after we did something that really bad to him...but...

Think it again...

I'm just nobody for you so that you do so to me..

So..I'm nobody to angry or even grudge to you..

If you at my place..You will feel how bloody shit hurt to be betray by your own friend...

I'm reallllllllllllllllllllllllly sure you that you will think twice if your "friend" ask to be so-called best friend back..

Yeah...still can be friend...but..I guess,its better only friend..and the term "best" already expired for you...

So...if you deserve to be my best friend..then prove it!..

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT PART...

DONT EVER BE BACKSTABBER..


okeh...guys...till now..that all...

::Friend always friend::

Deserve what you should deserve...
Feel what you make other deserve..
so that you can understand what they fell...

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As a scholar student....

So tired!...and so boring....

Why must life as students sooooooo damn sux...lol...

Our Sponsor should give us some space to let us to feel...

to feel what life are all about... why must soooooooooooo control.....

so that we dont misuse opportunity?...

Yezz..I agreed with that...as scholar...we should do it extraordinary than non-scholar.. but then...how can we perform if our timetable so tight...like hell..zzz

can we get some piece of time to enjoy our life?

haiz...hopefully I can release my stress as soon as possible before something else going wrong...

pray for me guys...

Ameen...

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Hanya Kau Yang Mampu

Ku cuba redakan relung hari
Bayangamu yg berlalu pergi
Terlukis di dalam kenangan
Bebas bermain di hatiku

Cerita tentang masa lalu
Cerita tentang kau dan aku
Kini tinggal hanya kenangan
Kau abadi di dalam hatiku

Harusnya takkan ku biarkan engkau pergi
Membuat ku terpuruk rasa ingin mati
Derita yang mendera kapan akan berakhir
Hanya engkau yang mampu taklukkan hatiku

Cerita tentang masa lalu
Cerita tentang kau dan aku
Kini tinggal hanya kenangan
Kau abadi di dalam hatiku

Harusnya takkan ku biarkan engkau pergi
Membuat ku terpuruk rasa ingin mati
Derita yang mendera kapan akan berakhir
Hanya engkau yang mampu taklukkan hatiku

Aku cinta oooohhhhhh….
Aku cinta ooooooo…..
Aku cinta oooohhhhhh….
Aku cinta ooooooo…..

Harusnya takkan ku biarkan engkau pergi
Membuat ku terpuruk rasa ingin mati
Derita yang mendera kapan akan berakhir
Hanya engkau yang mampu taklukkan hatiku

Aku cinta oooohhhhhh….
Aku cinta ooooooo…..
Aku cinta oooohhhhhh….
Aku cinta ooooooo…..

Hanya engkau yang mampu taklukkan hatiku
Oooooooooo….


-----------------------------------------------------------------
Hanya kau mampu..you are my only one..
You will be in my mind forever..

Farewell my only one...no matter how..you will be in my mind forever...

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Life Keep Moving...

Leaving all things behind...today...I'm learn something..
Before that...

::What I've Done::
In this farewell
There's no blood
There's no alibi
'Cause I've drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousand lies

So let mercy come
And wash away...

What I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

Put to rest
What you thought of me
While I clean this slate
With the hands
Of uncertainty

So let mercy come
And wash away...

What I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

For What I've done

I'll start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I'm forgiving what I've done

I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done
What I've done

Forgiving what I've done

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All ended..I will start my new life...
no more relying on someone..
I've my own friends that really appreciating me..
I should realize that...
Now...

"To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done
What I've done
Forgiving what I've done"

Like one of my friend said...forgive urself before others can forgive you...
love urself before love someone else..
Even my beloved ESL lecturer (Pn. Zaidah) said.."Love yourself first if you want someone to love you"

New Life..with the new hope..with the new circle of friends..
Hopefully I've enough time to recover after all..
For those I called friends..please...dont make me really disappointed with the term friends anymore..
Enough to felt it once...


Lastly...forgive me if I said something wrong to you...If I'm doing something wrong to you..
Start from now...I will change everything...for the sake of myself...
Time is the main key...so..give me time to fix,recover and change myself to be better friend, lover,son and student...

Wish me luck guys...

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Lumrah Kehidupan - Fatamorgana

Pulanglah pada Tuhan cahaya kehidupan
Syarat bahagia di dunia
Akhirat kekal selamanya pada Allah

Sudah menjadi lumrah kehidupan di dunia
Cabaran dan dugaan mendewasakan usia
Rintangan dilalui tambah pengalaman diri
Sudah sunnah ketetapan Ilahi

Deras arus dunia menghanyutkan yang terleka
Indah fatamorgana melalaikan menipu daya
Dikejar dicintai bak bayangan tak bertepi
Tiada sudahnya dunia yang dicari

Begitu indah dunia siapa pun kan tergoda
Harta, pangkat dan wanita melemahkan jiwa
Tanpa iman dalam hati kita kan dikuasai
Syaitan nafsu dalam diri musuh yang tersembunyi
Pulanglah kepada Tuhan cahaya kehidupan
Keimanan ketakwaan kepadanya senjata utama

Sabar menempuh jalan tetapkan iman di hati
Yakinkan janji Tuhan syurga yang sedia menanti
Imanlah penyelamat dunia penuh pancaroba
Hidup akhirat kita kekal bahagia
Imanlah penyelamat dunia penuh pancaroba
Hidup akhirat kita kekal bahagia

Pulanglah pada Tuhan cahaya kehidupan
Syarat bahagia di dunia
Akhirat kekal selamanya pada Allah
Allah

----------------------------------------------------
Alangkah betulnye lagu ni...
Aku terleka..dngan dunia...nafsu syaitan memenuhi pemikiran..
hingga melupakan janji Allah kepada hamba-hamba-Nya yg beriman...
cabaran..ujian...dugaan...betul2 mendewasakan diri...pemikiran...ntuk berfikir lebih matang...
Aku bersyukur sbb tidak dibawa arus dan hanyut lebih jauh...
Aku terlupa...terdapat hadith yg mengatakan...
::perempuan akhir zaman...akan menjadi fitnah bagi laki-laki::
Ya Allah...bertapa lalainya aku...dengan nikmat yang Engkau berikan...
Sungguh kuat ujian-Mu kali ini bagi ku...
Ya Allah...tabahkanlah hati hamba-Mu ini....
Aku memohon kepada Mu...

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Kembali

Wahai Tuhan yang Maha Pemurah
Terangilah ku dengan nurimanmu
Hanya kau tempat ku berserah
Mohon magfirah di dalam syahdu

Wahai Tuhan yang Maha Pengasih
Ampunilah segala dosaku
Laksana bumi di laut memutih
Hanyut ditelan gelombang nafsu

Hari hari yang telah aku lalui
Ingin ku tinggalkan terus bersemadi

Ingin aku kembali kepada fitrah insani
Tak sanggupku jelajahi rimba duniawi
Bebaskan lah diriku dari di belenggu
Dosa noda nafsu durjana

Terimalah taubatku ya Allah
Bimbinglah daku ke jalan redhamu
Moga sinarmu terangi hidupku
Didalam kegelapan
Aku kan kembali padamu Rabbi
Mengadapmu Ya Rabbulizzati
Segala ketentuan ku pasrahkan
Di hujung penghayatan

Wahai Tuhan yang maha pemurah

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Tolonglah ya Allah..terimalah aku kembali...
setelah apa yang telah aku lakukan...
tersasar jauh dari sisi-Mu....
aku terlupa di-Kau tempat aku sepatutnya mengadu...
Terima Kasih ya Allah sedarkan aku...
supaya aku tidak lagi jauh tersasar...
walaupun aku cekal diluar...aku rapuh didalam..terima kasih Allah memberi peluang kpda aku untuk kembali kepada Mu...
Sesungguhnya kasih-Mu lebih berharga dari kasih seorang manusia...
Terima Kasih Allah..mendekatkan aku kembali kpda Mu..
Aku amat2 berterima kasih...titisan air mata ku kepada Mu,ku rasa tidak mampu membalas hidayah Mu..
Ampunilah dosa-dosa hamba-Mu ini Ya Allah...sesungguhnya aku banyak berdosa kepada Mu...

~Insan Lemah~

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For Her..If U read This..Hope You know

sumtime we have to make a mistake to make we realise how to appreciate n learn sumthing from dat mistake....
hidup x slalunya hepi kan...
aku sgt stuju dgn phrase tu...
kdg2 kta terlalu ikut prasaan n smpai lukakan ati org yg kta syg...maybe aku la slh sorg org yg mcm tu..
patotka diberi second chance??
only "him" can answer this....
kalu kte btol2 yakin,insyaAllah we gonna make it...
learn from mistake n btolkan blik ape yg silap tu...
itu yg akan buat kte lbeh better dr sblom neh..for sure..
mungkin ade hkmah d stiap ape yg tjdi atas kte..yes,aku sgt yakin...stiap ape yg brlaku trhdp kte ade hkmahnya..
n aku sedang menanti hkmah itu....
to him,i know, u know this is for u...

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Listen To My Wish.....

Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired, I'm missing you again.....
I miss you....






A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love, purpose hard to find
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah

Dear God, the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold her when I'm not around, when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her and now I wish I'd stayed
Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired, I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

There's nothing here for me on this barren road
There's no one here while the city sleeps
And all the shops are closed
Can't help but think of the times I've had with you
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah

Dear God, the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold her when I'm not around, when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her and now I wish I'd stayed
Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired, I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away
I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways
And how I miss someone to hold
When hope begins to fade

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love, purpose hard to find

Dear God, the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold her when I'm not around, when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her and now I wish I'd stayed
Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired, I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

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Life....

I can't accept what happen...
I can't believe what had gone...
I can't accept it anymore....
I belongs to you

I can't forget about you about a second...
I can't trust anyone...except you...
I can't stop blaming myself....
I belongs to you

I want we to be like others happy couple...
I want we to be together again..
I want you to be my special person in my life..
I belongs to you

Be with me....
Be with me....
Please be with me....
Forever and Ever....

I belongs to you...
I'm Yours...
I need You...
I really love you....

I can't ever forget sweet moments that we had gone through...
I can't accept it anymore....
I can't be alone....
I can't forget you....

Be with me....
Be with me....
Please be with me....
Forever and Ever....

Your are my only one..
Will be forever and ever...
Only with You, I feel in Love...
I'm not easily say I'm in Love...

But for you..
You are everything to me..
You are everything to me..
You are everything to me..

I Love You
Forever and Ever....

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Stand By You...

This song really2 illustrate my life now....I start crying...its hard to stop...
I cant stand it anymore...I cant....

::you are the only one I'm thinking of::
neo ra go


You are the only one in my heart...I'm belongs to you...Only You...


Since the day you left without a word of goodbye
I feel that the scenery around me has changed.
The promise I made
that I would become your everything
and the incomplete memories
have also changed.

When you were crying by yourself back then,
if only had I run to you
you would still be by my side.
If I was given one more chance,
I would tell you once again
that I love you.

But the words that contain my overflowing feelings
cannot reach you anymore.

Where are you now?
Who are you being with?
What kind of clothes are you wearing?
What are doing and laughing at?
I am right here.
Even now, I am right here.
And I still believe that we will see each other again.
You're the only one I'm thinking of.

Just once more,
I want you to stand at my back with your tied hair
asking me "Guess who it is~~~"
and expecting me to say out your name.*
Just the two of us being silly like that day by day.

I can't forget you,
But the truth is, I don't want to forget you.
I can't feel even a bit of happiness
because you're not by my side.
No matter how hard I try,
I'll end up crying
and my tears just won't stop.


Where are you now?
Who are you being with?
What kind of clothes are you wearing?
What are doing and laughing at?
I am right here.
Even now, I am right here.
I still believe that we will see each other again.
You're the only one I'm thinking of.

Therefore, I am right here
singing the song by myself.
Even though I don't have any reason to embrace this pain anymore,
I can't help doing it.

Even if I know that the days
when you were by my side making my world shine
won't come back again,
and no matter what will happen,
no matter how far I'm lost,
I never ever want to forget that my heart has chosen to love you.

No matter where you are,
no matter who you are being with,
no matter what kind of dream you are dreaming of,
or what you are doing and laughing at,
I will be here forever.
Even now, I right am here,
believing in a day that we will meet again.

This feeling won't change,
and you are the only one I'm thinking of.
This feeling won't change,
and you are the only one I'm thinking of.

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Never Say Never



There's some things we don't talk about
rather do without
and just hold the smile
falling in and out of love
ashamed and proud of
together all the while

You can never say never
why we dont know when
time and time again
younger now than we were before

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go


Picture you're the queen of everything
as far as the eye can see
under your command
I will be your guardian
when all is crumbling
steady your hand

You can never say never
why we dont know when
time, time and time again
younger now then we were before

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go


We're pulling apart and coming together again and again
We're growing apart but we pull it together, pull it together, together again

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go



::The Fray::

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After....

Today.... 2 July 2009....

4 Days...passing...leaving me...

4 Days, after we ended...

4 Days, I miss You So Much....(Do you know that?)

4 Days, its hurt to be alone....


4 Days, I Miss You So Much....

4 Days, are like 4 years....

4 Days, i'm still hope that you can accept me...

4 Days, I Miss You So Much...

4 Days, enough to make me felt empty....

4 Days, I cant even contact you...

4 Days, Its Hurts me badly...

4 Days, I Miss You So Much....

4 Days, all memories that we had gone through, make me cry....

4 Days, you leaved me for no reason...

4 Days, I Miss You So Much...

4Days, I can't take it...I can't even accept it...

4 Days, I cried almost all night....

4 Days, I hoping you can accept me back....

4 Days, I can't even forget you even a second....

4 Days, I MISS YOU SO MUCH....

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The Most Precious Song That You Give To Me...

The Second song you introduce to me..after breathless..and suddenly..I really fall in love with this song..its really beautiful moments that time when I keep heard it all the time...

I love the way you stand by me
Baby tell me i will do whatever
Feels like nobody ever loved me until you loved me
Baby it just took one hit of you now I'm addicted

AND
"If I ever let you go,I would be no one"


Until You- Shayne Ward
Baby life was good to me
But you just made it better
I love the way you stand by me
Throught any kind of weather
I dont wanna run away
Just wanna make your day
When you fell the world is on your shoulders
Dont wanna make it worse
Just wanna make us work
Baby tell me i will do whatever

It feels like nobody ever knew me until you knew me
Feels like nobody ever loved me until you loved me
Feels like nobody ever touched me until you touched me
Baby nobody, nobody,until you
Baby it just took one hit of you now I'm addicted
You never know what's missing
Till you get everything you need,yeah
I don't wanna run away
Just wanna make your day
When you feel the world is on your shoulders
Don't wanna make it worse
Just wanna make us work
Baby tell me,I'll do whatever
It feels like nobody ever knew me until you know me
Feels like nobody ever loved me until you loved me
Feels like nobody ever touched me until you touched me
Baby,nobody,nobody until you
See it was enough to no
If I ever let you go
I would be no one
Cos I never thought I'd feel
All the things you made me feel
Wasn't looking for someone until you
Nobody, nobody, until you
Nobody, nobody, until you

If I can use time warp..I will make thing goes smooth than now....

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Best Of Me

It's so hard to say that I'm sorry, I'll make everything alright
All these things that I've done now what have I become
And where'd I go wrong
I don't mean to hurt, just to put you first
I won't tell you lies (I'm sorry)
I will stand accused with my hand on my heart
I'm just trying to say

I'm sorry, it's all that I can say
You mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done
If I could start again
I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets
And you would have the best of me

I know that I can't take back all of the mistakes
But I will try
Although it's not easy, I know you believe me, 'cause I would not lie
Don't believe their lies, told through jealous eyes, they don't understand (I'm sorry)
I won't break your heart, I won't bring you down
But I will have to say

I'm sorry, it's all that I can say
You mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done
If I could start again
I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets
And you would have the best of me

I'm sorry, its all that I can say
You mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done
If I could start again
I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets
And you would have the best of me

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First Love

Saigo no kisu wa tabako no flavor ga shita
Nigakute setsunai kaori

Ashita no imagoro ni wa
Anata wa doko ni irundarou
Dare wo omotterundarou

You are always gonna be my love
Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love you taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love song
Atarashi uta utaeru made

Tachidomaru jikan ga
Ugoki dasouto shiteru
Wasureta kunai kotobakari

Ashita no imagoro niwa
Watashi wa kitto naiteru
Anatawo omotterundarou


You will always be inside my heart
Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara
I hope that I have a place
in your heart too
Now and forever you are still the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love song
Atarashii uta utaeru made

You are always gonna be my love
Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love you taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Mada kanashii love song
Now and forever











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